When you hear that you are pregnant for the first time there are a million things that run through your thoughts. Suddenly you notice the kids around you. You take notice of them like never, and you start thinking about how your baby is going to behave. At one stage or another the panic sets in when you realize that you might have a fussy baby.
You then think back on your childhood and ask your parents how you behaved like a baby. Your worst fears are more real when they tell you that you gave them grey hairs. Handling a fussy baby can be tough but stressing about it won’t do you any good.
Agreement between parents
One of the keys to coping with a fussy baby doesn’t start with the baby. It begins with you and your spouse. Both of you were raised differently and have an idea about how to raise your child. The truth is that your views can differ significantly.
To minimize disagreements, you need to sit down and decide on specific parenting ground rules before the baby is born. At least, when the baby is fussy, you have a firm foundation, and that will enable you to cope with the challenges better. You will be able to make sound decisions and keep the peace.
Your comfort comes first
Some people will say that you need to put your baby in his or her room from the get-go, and others argue that the baby should be with you in the bed, or at least in your room. There is nothing wrong with listening to advice from other parents, but in the end, you are the ones who have to raise your child.
This is where you and your spouse need to decide on what works for you. If you can live with a clingy kid that doesn’t want to leave your room, then that is your decision. If you want your child to become independent and self-sooth from an early age, then you can opt for a separate room. In the end, your sanity is at stake, and you are the only ones who can decide what you can live with.
Kids can be trained to be fussy, or they can be trained to be less fussy. It is a combination of personality and also what you allow. You need to remember that you are the parents and that you can make decisions on behalf of your child. If you let your child rule your decisions, then you have lost half the battle.
Fussy kids will scream and throw tantrums, but you as parents can show your child that kicking up a fuss won’t necessarily get them what they want. Kids are selfish and will always want to get their way. Obedience isn’t something that we are born with, and it is something that we are taught.
For some children, it is way easier to fall into a habit than for others. But routine is your child’s and your sanity’s best friend. It creates an expectancy in your child and without them knowing, they start to get what they want because you taught them what they want.
You taught them that they want to take a bath at a time in the afternoon. You taught them that after bath time they want to be fed and that after they have been fed that they want to sleep.
At first, they are going to scream, cry and fight against what you want them to do, but if you persist and fight the motherly instinct to go and sooth, you will win that mini battle. It is dad’s job to keep mom healthy and keep her from running to the baby.
Setting up a visual monitor is a great way to provide you with peace of mind. At least then you can see that baby is only fighting the sleep and will eventually go to sleep. The biggest secret is persistence.